JOKE OF THE DAY: Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer: Madam, you were speeding.
Woman: Oh, I see.
Officer: Can I see your license please?
Woman: I’d give it to you but I don’t have one.
Officer: Don’t have one?
Woman: Lost it 4 times for drunk driving.
Officer: I see…Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.
Woman: I can’t do that.
Officer: Why not?
Woman: I stole this car.
Officer: Stole it?
Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Officer: You what?
Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the boot if you want to see.
The Officer looks at the woman, slowly backs away to his car, and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car.
A senior officer slowly approaches the car.
Officer 2: Madam, could you step out of your vehicle please!
The woman steps out of her vehicle.
Woman: Is there a problem sir?
Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Woman: Murdered the owner?
Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the boot of your car, please.
The woman opens the boot, revealing nothing but an empty boot.
Officer 2: Is this your car, Madam?
Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
The first officer is stunned.
Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.
The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.
The officer snaps open the clutch purse and examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.
Officer 2: Thank you madam, one of my officers told me you didn’t have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner. Woman
“Is there a problem, Officer?” the woman asked coolly as the flashing lights illuminated the roadside. “Madam, you were speeding,” the officer replied. When he requested her license, she casually said, “I don’t have one—I lost it four times for drunk driving.” The officer was incredulous, and she grinned, adding, “I stole this car.”
The officer’s shock deepened when she claimed, “Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.” As he backed away to call for backup, five police cars soon surrounded the vehicle. A senior officer approached and asked her to step out. She complied with a calm smile, asking, “Is there a problem, sir?”
When he confronted her about the murder claim, she tilted her head and asked, “Murdered the owner?” After opening the trunk to reveal nothing, she handed over her registration papers. The officer, confused, noted that one of his colleagues claimed she didn’t have a license. She then produced it from her purse, laughing, “Betcha that lying fecker told you I was speeding too.”
This encounter left the officers speechless and the station buzzing with disbelief. What started as a routine traffic stop turned into one of the most bizarre nights in the department’s history, as the woman’s outrageous claims felt like a twisted joke.